How to be joyful. How to be happy. Change your attitude towards others

From time to time, all creative people are familiar with the feeling of inner devastation and mental burnout. These days your mood becomes bad, new ideas don’t come to mind, you don’t want to create and you can’t do it. This state can occur after prolonged creative work or as a result of life shocks and stresses not directly related to creativity. Of course, you can give your body a rest, get some sleep, eat delicious food, go on vacation and, as a result, regain your strength. But how can you subsequently regain inspiration and find yourself back in the realm of ideas?

Negative emotions can arise in anyone. Everyone has problems, stressful situations, difficult days... All this pumps a ton of vital energy out of a person, makes him lethargic and tired, doomed and sick. Because of negativity, quarrels with loved ones, rude communication with others, curses between people and hatred of the whole world arise.

A crisis situation is characterized by internal or external events that make the usual pattern of life impossible. As a rule, such changes are accompanied by negative feelings and thoughts, and the emergence of a new life status. A crisis period makes it necessary to reconsider life, change priorities and values. This is a time of change.

How to attract love into your life, what should you do for this and is it necessary? Firstly, there are no universal recipes, tips or manuals to follow. Secondly, if in this case the word “work” is in principle appropriate, then the work should start with yourself, the changes should be primarily internal.

Everyone had problems associated with low mood, stress, and lashing out at loved ones over trifles. This must be dealt with, as it can cause discomfort to the human body. After all, physical and psychological health are interconnected.

Toilet paper, pasta, canned food, soap are just some of the items that are quickly disappearing from supermarket shelves in the midst of the coronavirus outbreak. Let's call a spade a spade: these are not purchases out of necessity, but purchases out of panic. And although this is a completely understandable reaction of people to an uncertain situation, it does not affect the lives of others in the best way.

The level of self-esteem somehow influences a person’s actions. A person constantly underestimates his capabilities, as a result, “life prizes” go to others. If your self-esteem is getting lower and lower, then the 20 tips given in this article will help you. By starting to apply them in your life, you can increase your self-esteem and become a confident person.

Many will agree that, from time to time, they are overcome by unwanted thoughts that cannot be gotten rid of. They can be so strong that even doing something interesting doesn’t help at all. This is accompanied by negative emotions, which add painful sensations. Sometimes it seems that it is impossible to overcome such thoughts, but if you look at the problem from different points of view, you can find the right solution.

We kill our happiness with our own hands. The negativity that we carry in ourselves towards others, destructive thoughts, envy, anger, resentment - this list is endless. Review your life, let go of unpleasant memories, get rid of people, activities and things that poison your mind. Tune in to goodness and positivity. Do something pleasant, something you have long dreamed of.

Is it easy to find happiness? Everyone around you repeats: becoming happy is easy, start cultivating this feeling in yourself, radiate positivity, smile at your reflection in the mirror, and everything will work out. But what if cats are scratching at your soul and all attempts to drive them away end in failure? This means that the moment has come for decisive action. We offer 10 recipes on how to become happy.

Get rid of clutter

Junk is one of the main obstacles on the road to happiness. And in the course of life, willy-nilly or not, a huge amount accumulates. And a bunch of useless things take up space where something more useful could live.

We are talking about both material and immaterial things. It's easier to start with the first ones. General cleaning of the pantry, closets and mezzanines will help tidy up not only your home, but also your head. A few bags of trash taken to the containers will also help get rid of negative energy.

If you haven't used an item for more than a year, you should probably get rid of it.

In the apartment full order? So, it's time to understand yourself. Unpleasant memories and old grievances are more difficult to throw away. But nothing is impossible. Just remember those who once caused harm, forgive and let go. If everything goes as it should, you will feel as if a heavy stone has been lifted from your soul.

Set a small goal and achieve it

Many people have their own “beacons” of happiness. And as a rule, they are practically unattainable. We often say: “If I have a million dollars, I will be absolutely happy.” Or “Oh, I’ll lose 20 kilograms and live!” But when else will this happen! And will it happen?

Therefore, it is worth lowering the bar a little. Set a realistic, small and easily achievable goal: lose a kilogram in a week, exceed the plan at work and earn a bonus, learn how to cook mind-blowing cakes, knit a scarf, etc.

Small achievements bring you closer to your global goal

Anything can become such a small “beacon”. It is important to record it: write it down, put a note in your diary, leave a “reminder” on your smartphone. And be sure to indicate deadlines. But only real ones! And you can begin to act.

Having won even a small victory, having fulfilled an insignificant point of the plan, a person experiences a feeling of satisfaction and contentment with himself, which means he becomes happier.

Help someone who is worse off than you

Psychologists say that by helping others, we elevate ourselves in our own eyes. And this is the first step towards feeling significant, strong and happy.

It seems that there is no one more unhappy and cannot be? Misconception. There are always many people around who need a helping hand. There is nothing easier than buying a couple of kilograms of sweets and taking them to the nearest nursing home. Such a gift will always be welcome there. And even more - communication with a person from the “big world”.

Psychologists have proven that communicating with animals makes people happier.

If you currently have absolutely no energy or time for such feats, you can take a simpler route and find a “foster grandmother.” Volunteer movements offer to enter into correspondence with those who, in old age, find themselves without a home and without a family. All you need to do is write her letters a couple of times a month, ask about her health and tell her a little about yourself. Believe me, this is a very big help.

A huge number of those who need your help are right now wandering the streets in search of food. We are talking about stray cats and dogs. Taking part in their fate is much more effective for your own good than suffering alone.

It’s great if you can feed and warm a homeless baby and place him in good hands. A saved life, even such a small and unnoticed one, is a reason to start being proud of yourself. It’s even better if you can keep your pet.

Find something you like

Very often, dissatisfaction, which does not allow us to feel happy, is caused by the fact that every day we do what we don’t want to do. Of course, you shouldn’t suddenly quit your boring job and take on an adventure. You can do what you really like in your free time. If this is really your business, then sooner or later it will bring long-awaited success, open up prospects and replenish your bank account.

Cooking with the whole family is a great way to bond and spend quality time together.

Don't know what you want to do? Just remember what you liked to do as a child. It is at this time that the brain does not yet have time to acquire a bunch of cliches. Therefore, kids only do what they really like to do. They don’t yet really know the words “necessary”, “prestigious” or “brings good income”.

So what did you like? Paint? Run to art school! Have you dreamed of becoming an actor? Amateur theaters are waiting for you! Did you love making Easter cakes? Or maybe buns made from real dough will turn out good too?

Remember the good things

Make it a rule every evening to remember the best events of the past day. It won't take much time. You can do this while sitting in a warm bath or lying in bed. The main thing is to approach the process responsibly. They do this not for show, but for themselves.

It is important to remember every minute all the most successful moments. Did a young man smile on the street? Okay, so you are beautiful. Did the boss praise you? Or at least he didn’t scold you? Great, my career is going as it should. Did you get a good manicure at the salon? Amazing!

Scientist Barbara Fredrickson found in an experiment that a person experiencing positive emotions pays attention to more opportunities in life than an individual with a negative mood.

In fact, there are a lot of such moments in a day. It’s just that some people don’t notice them, preferring to focus on failures and losses. But the law of attraction of like to like has not been canceled. If you think only about the negative, you will receive it in a triple dose.

Try doing this for several weeks, and you won’t notice how more and more good things will appear.

Look for new experiences

They act as a control panel for emotions. Once, and instead of despondency and sadness, a wave of joy and satisfaction turns on in your head.

The surest way is to go on a trip. Not necessarily distant. Even going out of town on a weekend will help you change your mind to something positive.

A parachute jump allows you to show composure, self-control, courage, and self-confidence.

But even if such an opportunity is not expected, do not despair. You can get new impressions by going to an unknown cafe, going for a walk around the city at night, starting to read a good book, or trying an unusual type of ice cream.

For those who are determined, we can advise giving a good shake-up. The most commonplace thing is to jump with a parachute, scuba dive, visit an amusement park.

Organize a marathon

Many people simply do not understand what happiness is. It is very easy to explain this to yourself. We need to organize a marathon. Moreover, this can be understood both literally and figuratively. Go out to the park and run. Run until you run out of energy.

Are they running out? Stop and sit on a bench. What you feel at the moment is happiness. Yes, it cannot be eternal. Happiness is a short moment, a stop, a respite. Sit down, catch your breath, look around and run on.

It has been experimentally proven that people who run become more resilient, tolerant, and less hot-tempered; is improving mental performance and sexual performance

The same can be done with own life. Just schedule a series of tasks and don't stop until you finish the last one. Don’t let yourself catch your breath, don’t let yourself think and sum up intermediate results until everything is done.

And only then can you stop. At this moment, life will seem beautiful and amazing. Enjoy this moment to your heart's content.

Important! Having decided to put this advice into practice, soberly calculate your strength. There is no need to immediately try to move mountains. This way you can become exhausted and break down.

Have an evening of happiness

This method is suitable even if life does not yet have the very main component that is necessary to feel happy. Even if you haven’t earned a million dollars yet, you haven’t met “the one”, your loved one, you haven’t bought a big house and an expensive car. For now you can do without all this.

The main thing is to surround yourself with your most favorite things, at least for one evening, to pamper yourself. delicious dishes and do the most enjoyable things. For example, take a bubble bath while drinking champagne. Or read a book while drinking cocoa.

Taking a relaxing bath relieves emotional and physical stress

It is important to protect yourself this evening from outside information. It’s better not to turn on the TV or go on social networks. They will definitely say something bad there. And it’s better to turn off your phone. You never know who can call at the most inopportune moment and ruin your mood.

A few hours spent exclusively in the way you like, makes thoughts run in a positive direction. You will see, after such a small “festival of the soul”, work will no longer seem so boring, and the boss will not seem such a beast, and life in general will not be so bad.

To become happier, change your colors

Sometimes little things can get in the way of feeling happy. Something that we seem to be used to and don’t notice, but the subconscious doesn’t want to accept and undermines us from the inside. It could be anything: uncomfortable furniture, annoying curtains on the windows, a tablecloth on the table with an overly active pattern. Therefore, it is worth starting to change what surrounds you.

One way to surround yourself with new colors is to start a renovation

Psychologists advise first of all to look for “your” color scheme. Much more depends on it than we can imagine. Colors will help improve your perception of life:

pink. It always has a calming effect, helps to cope with emotions and nervous shocks. This is the color of tenderness, kindness, femininity. It’s not for nothing that there are such expressions as “seeing life in pink color", "look at the world through rose-colored glasses";
grey. This is a neutral color and can be used as a background for anything. This color is associated with calmness, nobility, confidence, success, and practicality. It is great for those who feel constantly tired;
white. That same clean sheet from which you sometimes want to start your life. This is the color of hope, innocence, expectation of a miracle. It’s not for nothing that the handsome prince always arrives on a white horse;
brown. Associated with the earth and tree bark. It nourishes and gives strength. It also creates a feeling of comfort, calm, confidence, and reliability.

Don’t even want to change anything globally just yet. But you can always add “good” colors by making small changes. For example, change the bedspread on the sofa, buy new pillows, lay out a napkin on the table. Every time you catch these little things with your eye, you will feed yourself with positive emotions.

Remember everyone who needs you

Someone smart once said: “Happiness is being needed by someone.” And indeed it is. It is the awareness that we are important to someone that gives us strength, increases our significance in our own eyes, and makes us move forward.

When interacting with people, don’t forget to make them feel important too.

In order to feel happy, just make a list of everyone to whom you are dear, important, necessary. Don't forget anyone! Children, parents, loved ones, colleagues who would never have coped with all the work without you, a beggar who periodically receives a couple of rubles from you, neighbors, friends, buddies, etc.

There is no universal recipe for how to become happy. Everyone should have their own “secret” with which they can switch from negative to positive. But finding it can be difficult. However, this is not a reason to give up. Try, try, learn something new, and sooner or later you will definitely say: “I am a happy person.”

All people want to be happy. When a person is happy, he is confident, purposeful, healthy and enjoys life. But happiness is not a random gift of fate, but a whole process that depends on many factors that form in the human consciousness. After all, only by properly managing one’s thinking can a person always be happy. Let's look at what happiness is, what you need to get rid of in order to be happy, and how to attract positive emotions into your life.

Happiness is a state of a person when he experiences positive emotions, including joy, pride, pleasure, gratitude. In other words, happiness is a feeling of satisfaction with life.

Any positive emotion can be a source of happiness - from riding a roller coaster to the birth of a child. It depends on the values, interests, desires of the person. Therefore, there is no universal definition of happiness. But most often it is the result of good physical and mental (mental) health, which depends on a person’s behavior and lifestyle. This confirms the popular expression of the American journalist John Leland: “Happiness is a choice you make.”

What prevents you from being happy?

Unfortunately, there are many factors that are deeply rooted in a person's mind and prevent him from becoming happy, including:

Fear, which is confirmed by the words of the ancient Roman philosopher Seneca “Where there is fear, there is no happiness.” Fear has the ability to control life. It prevents you from doing not only dangerous, but also successful things. IN modern world there is a fear of happiness, or sherophobia,–a state in which people consciously avoid activities that evoke positive emotions. Psychologists believe that one of the reasons for sherophobia– the belief that happiness is fleeting and leads to negative events. If you overcome your fears, you can start living a happy life.
Negative thoughts. A person controls his own thoughts. If negative thoughts prevail over positive ones, he cannot be happy. The statement in your head “I will never be successful” will lead to uncertainty and low self-esteem. When a negative thought appears, you need to replace it with a positive one: from “This is impossible” to “I’ll try” and so on.
Past mistakes. Everyone has a past. It can be filled with good experiences or mistakes that spoil the present and future. People often continue to live in despair or bitterness over mistakes because they cannot let go of the baggage of the past. Only by letting go of the past can you make life easier, enjoy the present moment and allow yourself to be happy. Looking back, you'll be glad you did it.
Other people's dreams. Many people live the dreams of others - parents, friends, acquaintances. They are so busy trying to make other people's dreams come true that they don't live their own lives. They don't know what they want, what they need. There is only one life and you must live it on your terms. Stop living other people's dreams and find something that makes you happy.
Waiting for the approval of others. All people want to be loved, but some people constantly try to please others in order to meet their expectations. You will never please everyone because everyone has different ideals. Instead, focus on what makes you happy.
Comparing yourself with others. People often compare themselves to others, which is their fatal mistake. There will always be someone smarter and more successful than you. But you have your merits. Instead of watching other people's lives, it is better to focus on yourself and develop your strengths. Give up the desire to impress others and you will be much happier.

While happiness looks different for each person, it is only through searching that we can find what is right for us. To help you start your journey, here are 15 ways to become happier:

Think positively. It is impossible to live without problems, but your attitude towards them is important. Positive thinking helps to cope with difficulties, in which a person remembers that bad events are temporary and provide an opportunity to learn and grow. So always focus on good things and try not to focus on the negative.
Celebrate achievements and spend time on hobbies. Recognize your successes to be proud of yourself and see progress that motivates you to move forward and achieve new goals. Do what you love for fun. Hobbies help you cope with stress, create a social circle and make life more interesting. Develop and learn new skills in hobbies and professions to enjoy your work.
Express gratitude. The ability to appreciate big and small achievements has positive influence for your life. Give thanks for blessings every day to improve your mood and attract positivity.
Forgive insults. You may hold grudges against people who have caused you pain. But the main thing is to understand that resentment is a mental trauma that causes harm to you, since you store unpleasant, painful memories. Don't get caught up in anger and the desire for revenge. The way to free yourself from this pain is forgiveness. You can forgive the offender in your heart without engaging in conversation with him. Research has shown that letting go of grievances improves well-being, reduces anxiety, and strengthens the immune system.
Let go of what is out of your control. Ask yourself what you can change in a particular situation. If it is possible to solve the problem, make an effort and do it, otherwise just let it go.
Be surrounded by positive people. Spend time with like-minded people who support, inspire, lift your spirits and believe in you. Limit or stop communicating with people who upset you and cause bad emotions. Being around the people you love makes you happier. A study by American scientists showed that when hugging, the body releases beneficial Chemical substance“serotonin”, lowers blood pressure and heart rate, making you more relaxed.
Get a pet. Pets help relieve depression. If you are ready to be responsible for an animal, your four-legged friend will become a member of the family and bring many smiles and laughter. A pet's love in response to care can make everyone happy.
Observe healthy eating and good sleep. Physical health is closely related to emotional state person. Eating large quantity fruits, vegetables, containing many useful substances (vitamins, minerals), improves appearance, improves mood and productivity. To maintain good health you need daily healthy sleep with a duration of 8-9 hours.
Exercise physical exercise. Regular exercise is good for the body and mind. Physical activity stimulates the production of energy and happiness hormones “endorphins”, which improve well-being, self-esteem, and quality of sleep. Adults are recommended to engage in various physical activities (walking, running, cycling, dancing, etc.) for at least 3 hours a week. Yoga and meditation are suitable for relieving stress, helping to relax the muscles.
Get moving, spend time outdoors. Movement is life. Get outside, as being in the fresh air relieves stress, relaxes you, while oxygen adds energy. The mood is lifted by sunlight, under the influence of which the body produces vitamin D. People lacking this vitamin are more prone to depression, anxiety, and fatigue.
Set goals. According to psychologists, people who set goals—short-term or long-term—are happier than people without goals. Neuroscientist Richard Davidson discovered that working toward a goal not only activates positive feelings, but also suppresses negative emotions. Goals motivate people to move forward.
Plan pleasant events. Plan a vacation or a pleasant anticipated event. A reminder of an upcoming trip, concert, sporting event or meeting with friends lifts your mood in any environment. Good experiences bring happiness.
Cultivate kindness in yourself, help others. Research shows that acts of kindness contribute to your well-being. Kindness and helping other people and animals gives a feeling of warmth. Charity, public Works or other ways of helping make you happier.
Smile more often. A sincere smile is a symbol of happiness. Think about what makes you laugh. When you smile, your brain releases serotonin, which lifts your mood. Learn to smile when you look at your reflection in the mirror. Positivity will fill your life with happiness.
Enjoy simple things. Learn to enjoy the little things, as true happiness is based on spiritual values and lies in simple things. The presence of a loved one, friends, family nearby is already a happy, unique moment. Some people chase material things (a car, a house, shoes, etc.), mistakenly believing that they will make them truly happy. But rich people don't report more high level happiness. Therefore, you need to appreciate what you have.

How to find happiness (video)

In the video you will find useful tips about how to make yourself happy.

Thus, happiness is a choice, since it largely depends on a person’s behavior and on how he manages his emotions and builds relationships with others. You control your happiness by choosing every day whether to be happy or not. Follow these simple tips to become the happiest person you can be.

We all have difficult times. If you're feeling down, whether it's due to clinical depression, a breakup, or the loss of a loved one, try to pull yourself together and overcome the sadness. This is not an easy and rather lengthy process, and first you need to map out the right path and choose the appropriate methods.

Steps

How to overcome long-term depression

Understand your feelings. Realize that you are depressed. This important initial step will help you cope with sadness and despondency. Depression often seems like a natural state to us, but it is not. To successfully overcome depression, you must first recognize it.

Discuss with your doctor possible ways treatment. Depression is often caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, which is susceptible to drug treatment. Even if you suspect that your condition is due to other causes, discuss your symptoms with your doctor. Your doctor will be able to recommend measures to help you find peace of mind.

Don't hesitate to ask for help. Depression is very dangerous. When you are depressed, you feel lonely, worthless, and empty. No matter how deep your depression is, talk to someone you trust.

If you are having suicidal thoughts, call our 24-hour line immediately. hotline and talk to a psychologist:
- 8 499 216-50-50 - emergency center psychological assistance Russian Emergency Situations Ministry
- 8 495 988-44-34 (toll-free in Moscow) or 8 800 333-44-34 (free in Russia) - crisis hotline
- 8-800-2000-122 - children's helpline

Make written plans for each day. With depression, there is a feeling of purposelessness and uselessness of existence. The desire to get up in the morning disappears and literally everything falls out of hand. The world seems hostile and suppresses all will. To stay motivated and focused, you need to set simple and clear goals.
- Write down everything you are going to do, down to the smallest detail. Don't be afraid to write down the most seemingly insignificant things, such as “brush your teeth,” “pick up the kids from school,” “eat,” or “don't smoke.” Focus on the everyday little things you have to do.
- At the end of the day, write down everything you did if it helps you. This way you will once again go through all your achievements, even the most insignificant ones.
Try to exercise at least 30 minutes a day. Your mood is influenced by a variety of factors, and one of the most important is your normal physical condition. According to research, physical activity has a direct effect on mood and general health due to the fact that it promotes the production of endorphins, which help cope with stress and cause a feeling of joy.
- It is not at all necessary to seriously engage in sports. Choose something you like. Start jogging or hiking. Play badminton with your friends. Do what makes you happy.
- Sleep 8 hours a night and go to bed at the same time. Normal sleep allows you to rest and recharge your energy for the whole day, which has a beneficial effect on your mood.
Change your diet. Food has a direct impact on your mood. To improve your well-being, consume more complex carbohydrates and limit refined sugar and processed foods. Try to eat more greens, whole grains, fresh vegetables and fruits, and reduce your consumption of processed foods.
- Increase your intake of omega-3 unsaturated fatty acids, which are found in flax grains, fish, nuts and tofu. These acids promote normal brain function and improve mood.
- Drink 8 glasses (2 liters) of water daily to keep your body hydrated. Even mild dehydration can cause headache and fatigue, which negatively affects mood.
Get regular sun exposure. According to research, vitamin D levels affect overall health and mood. This vitamin is necessary for all people, and especially for those who suffer from depression. Seasonal depression often occurs in winter, when the days get shorter and we don't get enough sun. A good dose of sunshine can do wonders for your mood.
- If you live in an area where there is little sunny days, buy a good home solarium. If such a solarium is too expensive for you, install natural light lamps in your home instead of fluorescent lamps.
How to get over a breakup
1. Wait a while. Breaking up a relationship can be very painful. Even if your relationship didn't last, breaking up can hurt. If you feel that you suddenly find yourself completely alone, remember that you were alone before meeting the person who left you, and try to overcome the dark streak in life.
  - Give free rein to your grief. Eat a large portion of ice cream. Watch a sentimental melodrama. Don't hold back your emotions, let them out.
  - Don't go too far. Don't mope for more than a couple of days for every month you spent with the person who left you. Try not to react too violently to a breakup.
2. Stop talking to your ex. If you want to get back to your normal life, stop rubbing salt in the wound. After breaking up with someone, stop communicating with them. This should be done even more so if he was the initiator of the break. Break off all relationships, at least for a couple of weeks.
  
  Celebrate your newfound freedom. Breaking up a relationship also has its positive sides. Yes, now you are alone, but at the same time you are free! Now you can afford many things: turn on loud music early on Saturday morning, have a snack in bed, and so on.
  - Remember what your ex didn't like and do it!
  - Dramatically change your appearance, something you never dared to do before. You'll like it! You belong only to yourself, and are free to do whatever you like and not others.
  - Go to a party with your friends and really relax. Feel the beat of life around you. However, keep it in moderation. Because of the breakup, you should not go to great lengths and abuse tobacco, alcohol or drugs.
3. Change what you would like. Sometimes ending a relationship is a great chance to change for the better. Think about something you have long wanted to do, but relationships got in the way. Now you have a great chance to catch up!
  - Get in shape. Start playing sports. By doing this, you will improve your well-being and increase your self-confidence.
  - If you share a home with a partner, consider moving to a new place. An old place can remind you of old times and make you sad.
  - Perhaps it's time for even more dramatic changes. Are you satisfied with your current job? Are you satisfied with everything? What would you like to do? What would bring you joy? Maybe you should try moving to another city and completely change your life?
4. Discuss your problems with a loved one. Try pouring out your soul - it really brings relief. Choose a close friend or relative and confide in him your feelings. Even if you're not used to sharing your problems with others, opening up to someone you trust can make you feel better right away.
5. Chat with friends. This is the time when you should spend more time with other people. Meet your friends more often or just go for walks in crowded places instead of being locked up at home. Avoid loneliness and just communicate with people on different topics. Cheer for your favorite sports team together or discuss things at work. This will help you take your mind off things.
  - Sometimes you really want to be alone. It's quite normal. If you don't want to be around happy people having fun at some point, stay home. However, try to distinguish between cases when you really need to be alone and the desire to engage in self-flagellation.
6. Find some extra activities for yourself. The more busy you are with various activities, the less time you will have to think about your ex. Logical, isn't it? Find something to do that takes up most of your free time to keep depressive thoughts at bay.
  - Plunge yourself into your work. It may be worth taking on extra hours or expanding your responsibilities. Start earning more money and moving up your career to keep your mind busy with work and crowd out sad thoughts.
  - Take up a new hobby. Sometimes a breakup can be the impetus to write a novel, learn to play the bass guitar, or take up diving.
7. Start dating someone when you're ready . Although it may seem strange and even wild at first, sooner or later you will meet someone. Even if your relationship doesn't turn into anything more serious, you can just have fun. Many people do this.
  - Try not to compare your new partner with your old one. This may be difficult at first. If you're not ready to date someone, put it off until later and don't force yourself.
  - To determine if you are ready to date someone new, try online dating. This method may be stressful at first, but it is a good way to test yourself and find out if you are ready for a new relationship. If this doesn't make you feel uncomfortable, try dating someone.
How to cope with the loss of a loved one
1. Don't worry about doing everything "right." Grief and sorrow are expressed in different ways. Many people try to fit certain stereotypes, believing that otherwise others will not understand them. This can cause deep feelings of guilt and make grief worse. If you don't know how to behave, don't pay too much attention to it. Behave naturally.
  - Death is an integral part of our life. Losing a loved one is always difficult, but remember that life goes on. Try to smile in the face of death and cope with the grief that befalls you.
2. Surround yourself with people who are willing to take care of you. This will encourage you, even if you personally do not make any effort. Talk to others about your loss and let them know how you feel.
  - Share your memories. Talk about old times, remember a few notable incidents, look at old photographs.
  - Sometimes it is better to refrain from constantly talking about the person or pet who left you. Such conversations can temporarily relieve grief, but they remind you of the loss and do not allow you to escape from sad thoughts. Try to discuss abstract topics from time to time: sports, new films, etc.

10 minutes to read.

It would seem that everything is simple. Either you are happy or you are not, and you cannot influence anything. It turns out that you can become happy voluntarily-compulsorily. You just need to try a little and acquire some useful habits. The Huffington Post published a list of 21 habits that almost every happy person has. The material caused a tremendous resonance, gaining more than 250 thousand likes on Facebook in two days. Now this material is available to you.

Let's be happy already.

In 2004, Martin Seligman, the father of “positive psychology,” formulated three types of happy lives:

life is a pleasure, when you fill your life with as many pleasures as you can fit into it;
a caring life where happiness is found in work, parenting, love and relaxation;
and living a meaningful life, which “consists of recognizing where your greatest strengths lie and using them for something greater than yourself.”

He conducted research on “What Leads People to Highest Satisfaction” and was surprised by the results. It turned out that the pursuit of pleasure hardly has anything to do with this feeling. All this hedonism is just the “whipped cream and cherry” on the cake of satisfaction based on a life of concern or a life of meaning.

And while this probably sounds like an attempt to justify what many people call “living is not in vain,” happy people have certain habits that you can adopt that may make your life better and happier.

Habits of happy people.

They surround themselves with happy people
Joy is contagious. Researchers from the Framingham Heart Study, who have been studying the phenomenon of "spreading happiness" for more than 20 years, found that those who are surrounded by happy people are "more likely to be happy in the future." A sufficient reason to reduce the proportion of sad friends at the expense of cheerful ones.

They are smiling
Even if you don't feel happy, think about something positive and smile at the thought. This should help. But it's important not to pretend. If you smile and think about bad things, it will only get worse.

They develop the ability to recover
Psychologists believe that the ability to recover is the antonym of depression, not happiness. Happy people know how to recover from shock. It's a kind of weapon against the inevitable shit that happens in every person's life. A Japanese proverb says: “Fall seven times, get up eight.”

They try to be happy
Yep, it's as simple as it sounds: just trying to be happy greatly enhances your inner emotional state.

They are attentive to the good
Celebrating important achievements that took a long time to achieve is important, but happy people also pay attention to small victories. When we take the time to notice the good little things, we get a little more emotional payoff, which makes us feel better about ourselves throughout the day.

They appreciate simple pleasures
Eat ice cream on a bench in the park, pat a dog behind the ear, feel and see a rainbow. Happy people really value things that cost no one anything at all and appear on their own. Finding happiness in the little things and being grateful for everything you have is directly related to feeling joy.

They devote part of their time to giving
Even though there are only 24 hours in a day, positive people spend some of those hours doing good that will surely come back and bring something good into their lives. Volunteer work or simply selfless good deeds have a great impact on both mental and physical health. And such people are less likely to become depressed. Interestingly, psychologists know such a thing as the “helper’s high.” They even compare it to the high from drugs, because good deeds are a trigger for the production of dopamine.

They allow themselves to lose track of time.
When you're immersed in something that's incredibly challenging, inspiring, and meaningful, you experience something called "flow." Happy people subconsciously look for activities that require specific skills, challenge them, motivate them, and have clear goals. So that they are “carried away” by this flow, which evokes a feeling of success.

They prefer deep communication to light chatter.
There's nothing wrong with exchanging a few light words with someone, but sitting down to a long conversation about serious topics is great practice for feeling joyful and alive. It's also more satisfying than just blablabla. One of the top five regrets of dying people is “I wish I had more courage to talk about how I feel.” A sentimental thing that really shows that we talk more about the weather than about what makes our hearts swell.

They spend money on others
Money can buy happiness. But only if you spend it not only on yourself, but also on other people. Giving is better than taking.

They know how to listen
When you listen, you open yourself up to new knowledge. When you speak, you block their entry. Plus, by listening, you show people your confidence and respect for them. And people cannot remain indifferent to this; they experience positive feelings towards you, which make you a little happier. Listening is a skill that strengthens relationships.

They keep in touch
Write a text message, call or post something on social networks - it's fast. But flying halfway across the country to see a dear friend is much cooler. Every person needs a sense of belonging to other people, and for this you need to communicate with friends. And not online. Social media They don’t allow us to touch a person, and this is very important for happiness. It has long been proven.

They see the bright side
Optimism has a great effect on health: less stress, which means fewer heart problems and better pain tolerance. And if you choose to intentionally look for the good in everything that happens, then you choose health and happiness.

The same Seligman, in one of his books, gave one of the best characteristics of optimists and pessimists: “The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they believe that bad things will last a long time, will destroy everything they have achieved, and through their own fault. Optimists, who face exactly the same difficulties in this world, think about bad luck in the opposite way. They believe that failure is temporary, that it is not their fault: circumstances, bad luck or other people. Such people are not bothered by defeat. When surrounded by adversity, they take it as a challenge and simply try harder.”

They appreciate good music
There is power in music. Such that it can compete with the power of a massage. Choosing the right music is important factor. A happy or sad song can influence our perception of the world. In one study, people were asked to judge from photographs whether the people in them were happy or sad. In most cases, their response was determined by the mood of the music the subjects were listening to at that moment. This means that you need to try to listen to more happy music.

They go offline
Technology, news, and an abundance of information will not disappear anywhere if you simply step away from the computer for a while, do not take your tablet with you, or turn off your phone for a while. A digital detox gives your brain a chance to recharge and rest.

They engage in spiritual practices
Expressing gratitude, sympathy and mercy is an important part of almost any religion. Asking the “big questions” gives our lives context and meaning. A 2009 study found that children who believed they had a purpose and a higher purpose in life were happier than their peers who lived life simply. And it’s not just about religion, of course, but about any spiritual practices. “Sacred rituals” that exist in our lives. Whether it's meditation, prayer, just time to reflect on an ongoing basis. Daily, weekly, monthly - it doesn’t matter. The main thing is to have such an anchor, which organizes life, makes it spiritually richer and gives us a respite from the eternal race.

They exercise
Physical activity gives a person endorphins. Endorphin makes a person happy. Exercise relieves symptoms of depression, anxiety, depression, thanks to chemical reactions in the brain. Plus, working out gives us the opportunity to appreciate and love our body, and this is very important for a good mood. Interestingly, even if a person does not lose weight from physical activity or does not reach the top, he still loves himself more.

They go for a walk
Nature is fuel for the soul. Even a twenty-minute walk in the fresh air has a good effect on our well-being. When we feel sluggish, we pour ourselves a coffee, but it would be better to just take a walk and recharge from nature.

They're lying in bed
“Getting off on the wrong foot” is not such a fiction. Waking up at the correct sleep period is one way to avoid bad mood during the day. Doctors do not recommend immediately jumping out of bed and running; it is better to start waking up not on your feet, but in the comfort of blankets and pillows. And, of course, you need to get enough sleep.

They laugh
You've heard it a hundred times: laughter is best medicine. Laughter triggers the production of the right hormones in the brain, which make us feel happier and reduce sensitivity to pain and stress. And by the way, it’s better to laugh on a regular basis. It is believed that the brain responds to regular laughter in the same way that the body reacts to regular exercise.

They walk wide
And this is not a metaphor. Happy people have a freer, more relaxed gait, and their steps are wider. And this starts a chain reaction in the same brains. The more freely we walk, the happier we are, no matter how paradoxical it may sound. Try walking with small shuffling steps, staring at your feet. Are you feeling happy? That's it.

Based on materials from: Huffington Post Translation and adaptation by AdMe.ru

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